I just don't believe it. 2011 is upon us. Time to go over my goals and carry them over from 2010, because I can tell you right now..I did not accomplish all of the things I set out to do. My natural bent, is that of an athlete...I am a high performer, high goal setter. I will have 20 outrageous goals I try to tackle every year. As I continue to mature (age), I have learned to stop doing that to myself. I would say I have accomplished some cool things on my list for 2010, yet on the same token, I straight up, sucked in some of the other things that I wanted to accomplish.
I think the number one goal on my list this year, is to truly grow deeper in Loving and Listening in my relationship with my savior Jesus Christ. It's seems so easy to just say this, but I honestly struggle more than I feel like I should in this particular area of my spiritual life. I discovered that I really never emotionally attach to too many things, for fear of disappointment, or rejection. After some earthquake situations rocked my world just recently, I began to look over the goals I've written over the last few years, and they touched on everything except this area of my life. Allowing and receiving Love, Listening and hearing the leading of Holy Spirit. I wish I could speed this process up, it's 20 years and counting and I am still learning to open up, and emotionally allow myself to receive the Love of Christ and Listen to Him.
Now, you are probably wondering, ok Fahren, that's cool, how do you plan to do this? You asked a very relevant question, and I asked the Holy Spirit the same question. He revealed this scripture to me, I've never even come across it before, I've read similar scriptures, but not this one...and it absolutely ministered to me. I've been meditating on this scripture, and hands down, it is going to be my foundation for 2011.
Proverbs 1:33 " but whoever listens to me will live in safety and be at ease, without fear of harm."
I mean, this scripture right here, would have kept me out of some self-sabotaging issues as well as direct attack from the enemy. This scripture didn't even have the word Love in it, but for me...it's spoke volumes about Love and the Holy Spirit just gently spoke this to my spirit. .."If you love the Lord, like you say you do Fahren, then listen to Him, in all things, not just some things. Love listens, Love is safe, Love brings Peace, Love protects..Love just does so many things. I still think people use this word way to loosely, like it's a catch phrase or word trend. Love is the real deal, when you allow it to be what it is. You can't conjure it up, it comes out of the experience of receiving Love when you really didn't deserve it, earn it, work for it, or even operate in it yourself. Man oh man, from here on out, I am going to be more aware of how I use and represent Love.
It's so funny, how we hear what we want to hear, listen to what we should not be listening to, and ignore the things that we really need to hear. Just this past Sunday, my Pastor began teaching on "Taking heed to what you hear", and it just hit me all upside the head. I just have not been a very good listener in some areas of my life starting with listening to the needs of my own heart and then moving out from there, regarding the needs of my husband and my children. I do well in listening and executing what everyone else needs, outside of these 3 areas of my life. So this year, this is going to be my focus. To some of you, this is nothing, you grew up in Christ, understanding what unconditional love is, and are giving and receiving full on in this area, Praise the Lord..pray for me, cause I will be in that place soon, I may do ok, but I need to massage this revelation into all areas of my life and be better than than just ok. I can do more, need to do more and will do more in this area...especially if I want to continue to do great things for the Kingdom of God.
I can no longer be afraid to allow Love to penetrate me and overtake me in every area of my life..surrendered to the Love of Christ that is. I am not sure what it was, that would only allow it to a certain level, and then I would build a wall of protection around the tender areas of my heart. Well, I take that back, I do know what caused me to defend and deflect, but I can no longer keep using my past as a deflector... as if God would leave or forsake me...but it goes back to the area of listening and hearing. His Word says and tells me that He would never leave of forsake me. His Word tells me that He would not give me more than I can handle. His Word tells me that His yoke is easy, and His burden is light... but I did not always hear or listen with my heart and my Spirit what His Word has been speaking and saying. This will not be the case this year however, I will overcome in this area, I believe it is the Key to unlocking greater things that are to come in my life...in some obvious areas, and in those not so obvious areas. .
My Pastor said this on Sunday, that just sealed the deal of what I am going to make priority in this season of life...
"Take heed to what you hear, because it decides how you will live. One thought ( negative or positive) can either keep you on the course that God has planned for you, or throw you off course. God always wants us growing and increasing,whether it is growing roots (deeper) or producing stock ( higher). Start with believing that God has great plans for your life "( Jer 29:11) ~Casey Treat~
What a perfect timing Holy Spirit Word this is for me. God having great plans for me, means that He Loves me. I heard this so differently than any other time before. So here I go, walking and believing that God has great plans for my life. My goal is to get better at walking in this, and giving the same level of Love He has for me, back to Him or at least try my very hardest. It is all going to start in "loving and "listening" and taking heed to what I hear.
Be blessed this New Year yawl, I definitely plan to be!
~Fahren
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